It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
