didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
No subtext here. People are naked.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
