smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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