NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
