About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
