WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
