They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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