NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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