Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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