I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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