used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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