1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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