butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
