Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize