I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
