You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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