If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
