this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
