He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
