Kiss
Puke
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
a search helicopter?!
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
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