who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
