final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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