Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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