he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize