He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
