To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
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