And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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