I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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