I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize