NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
