i barfeds in our rink
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
