let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
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