Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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