Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
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