this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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