My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
