Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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