Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
