Yo dont text me then not text me
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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