The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
