"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
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