butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
