Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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