Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
