I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
