She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Even my vagina gasped.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
