i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
