he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize