I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
