i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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